10. Continue
10. CONTINUE
Step 10 is: “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.”
I knew from the beginning that an illustration on the word “continue” would come easily. Some of my other drawings may seem complex, but I honestly try to keep things simple. There are plenty of examples of things that continue. There are things like a train on a track, a spinning wheel, a roaring river, etc. All are good examples of continuation.
As part of my illustration project, I looked up the meaning of that key word in a Webster’s 1930s dictionary. Bill Wilson wrote the steps around 1939 so I thought that the definitions would be helpful, and I was right:
“Continue – v. to remain in a given place or condition.”
No real surprise there, but I did notice that all of my examples of “continue” were things in motion: train, wheel, river, etc. Yet the definition included things which remain still. One can indeed continue a stare, musical note, a pose, standing guard, etc. without moving.
Since both aspects were included in the same definition (I confine myself to the first numbered definition in the dictionary), I thought I should include both in my drawing. Plus, I wanted all of it to somehow relate to my recovery. Now my self-assigned task was looking more challenging.
It sounded like a riddle. What’s something that continues by remaining in motion and in place? You can probably think of something but I cannot. So, I tried to think of something about recovery that was difficult to continue doing. Now, that was easy. I had trouble remaining calm while those around me acted insane. It felt impossible to ignore all that commotion.
That’s when the two meanings of continue emerged from my mind in the form of a dog and a cat. The dog is me as I would like to be: calm, steady, peaceful, serene. The cat is more like my unguarded emotions: angry, scared, crazy, loud, and/or energetic. Like the dog, I wish I could just ignore everything and be at peace. Like the cat, I see a thousand and one reasons to run away, get into trouble, break something, hide somewhere, then attack suddenly. Over and over again.
There you have it. A drawing of a dog and cat which reminds me I can “continue” by taking action OR by remaining still. God can work with me either way, but He probably knows I pay better attention when I am peaceful. Step Ten itself suggests that is true: “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.” I suppose that Step could trigger some people to go raving mad, but for me it is a way to know Peace and to fully comprehend the word Serenity.